Random Roommates As Told By Dwight & Jim

Random roommates in the dorms or just in general can either be the best thing that ever happened to you, the worst thing you ever have to deal with, or somewhere in between. Regardless, living with someone you don’t know is an adventure. There’s the possibility that your random roommate will be your best friend for the rest of your life and there’s also the likelihood that you’ll see them on the local Booked page in a few years.  Either way, you’re bound to get a story out of it. It’s like our favorite frenemies, Dwight Schrute and Jim Halpert, deal with one another during their time at Dunder Mifflin. Although hopefully your roommate doesn’t move your desk over to their side of the room to make MegaDesk while you’re home for Thanksgiving.

1. Sometimes you realize you and your random roommate are essentially the same person. Like, you have everything in common and you can already see a friendship blossoming that will last forever. You just know you’ll be able to stay up late talking about Battlestar Galactica, spend hours testing your favorite beet recipes, and discussing which bear is best (it’s the black bear, duh). 

2. Although other times, you can tell it’s not gonna be the best setup in your life. You really hope it’s not too late to move down the hall into the room with that girl whose roommate never showed up. Surely it’s not too late. Except when it is too late.

3. Or, you get the one who is clueless. A roommate who is so socially isolated and not at all in touch with the culture, that you’re not sure if they’ve been living under a rock or if that’s an insult to those who do because even they know more than your roommate. 

4. When you get the social roommate, however, they invite people over. All the time. Without telling you. They don’t tell you who these people are, how they got here, when they’re leaving, or why they’re even here. And they see nothing wrong with it.

5. There’s always the thief roommate. You know, one day you’re leaving for class remembering exactly where your Tory Burch sunglasses are and then you come home and they’re mysteriously no longer on your desk next to your jar of pens. Hmm. 

6. The lying roommate is even worse. They lie about their entire backstory just to seem cool, or they stretch the truth at least. Like saying that they partied all the time in high school when really they were a Disney impersonator for kids’ birthday parties. And they think you’re stupid enough to buy it? Nah.

7. But if you got lucky, you’ve got a new best friend. You have someone to go to all those freshman events for free food with, you have someone to make funny Snapchat stories with, and you have an extra closet.

8. Although some roommates take the closet thing too far. All of a sudden, your roommate is wearing your favorite sorority sweatshirt without asking, and she’s not even in your sorority. Like, just why? To be annoying? 

9. So you obviously have to get even. You can’t just let her take your stuff without consequences. Not in my dorm, missy. No ma’am. So you don’t get mad, no, you get even. It’s past the point of passive-aggressive Post-It notes. 

10. She obviously is livid at the prank and you have plausible deniability, even though it was very obviously your doing. The tension grows between the two of you and you know it was petty and immature, but it just felt so good. You end up on a prank high because she just deserves it. And she’s gullible enough to fall for it.

11. However, after awhile, she figures out it’s you. And then the moment you never thought would come, comes: you have to have a meeting with your RA. You’re not sorry, and you know she isn’t gonna change, and to be honest, you kinda look like the bad guy for trying to get even. 

12. So the RA makes you do some cheesy makeup agreement. And you actually have to record your process through it, and report back to the RA, and you’re so sick of each other that you just suck it up and do it so you can get that much closer to moving out. 

13. But if you and your random roommate are besties, you’re dreading the day you have to move out. You’re so used to seeing their face every day. And maybe you’ve agreed to live together again, or maybe not, but you’re still best friends and moving out of the place you became best friends is so sad. After all, this little dorm room is the place where the best friendship of all time was born. 

14. The idea of hanging out with other people seems absurd as move-out day approaches. Why would we go out and be social when that takes so much work and you two already have fun in your own room? You’ve been there with each other all year, through the ups and downs, the dining hall meals, sneaking fruit home from the dining hall in your backpack, getting to know the town together, and going out together. But now is the time to bond as much as possible

15. By the end of the year, you realize how weird it is to live with a stranger. If you had the worst year of your life living with a stranger, you realize it’s weird because they could be a total nightmare. But when you end the year as best friends, it’s weird to think there was a time when this person who now means the entire world to you was once a stranger in your dorm room. You now know that this random person can quote every line to your favorite movie, is always down for a Taco Bell run, has met your family and even become part of it, and become one of the most important people in your life. 

Random roommates are like weird coworkers. Everyone has a story about one, or will at one point in their lives. Sometimes they’re hilarious, awkward horror stories and sometimes they’re sweet “this is how I met my best friend” stories. Either way, it’s an experience, and ultimate duo Dwight and Jim get it. It's hard, but it's totally worth it.

 

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